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Extraordinary Ted
By John | August 30, 2009
Last week Ted Kennedy died. This weekend the tributes to him have been truly extraordinary. His funeral was attended by a who’s who of American politics.
What was so extraordinary about Ted Kennedy? What did he do in his 77 years to deserve such an outpouring? Well, he served 47 years in the U.S. Senate. And he had to overcome enormous obstacles throughout his life. What obstacles, you ask? Here are a few:
1) His background. Ted was terribly handicapped by being born a Kennedy. His father was an amoral and ruthlessly ambitious person who used political connections to amass fame and fortune. Ted grew up in a family of users; not producers. Joe Kennedy exhibited a contempt for those who earned their way, a contempt he passed on to his heirs. In the Kennedy world, you get ahead by stepping on the heads of others. Those poor saps who work for a living need to be cared for by the elite, political class. Teddy never had a chance. He didn’t understand capitalism.
2) His morality. Being from the political class, Ted was above morality. Morality is for suckers - you know, the working class. Ted was kicked out of Harvard for cheating. In 1969 he left a party after a few drinks with a sexy babe, drove into a lake, then left the young lady in the car to drown while he figured out how to avoid prison time for manslaughter while driving drunk. Being from the political class, Ted was able to avoid reporting the incident until he sobered up, and was only charged with leaving the scene of an accident. A moral person would have thought about the victim, reported the accident immediately, been given a blood alcohol test, and spent several years in prison.
3) His slovenly personal life. Ted spent a good share of his life with his belly to the bar, one hand on a drink, and the other hand up someone’s skirt, his puffy red face perched atop his marshmallow body. His athletic build melted inside his enormous girth. Most people living this life style would have ended up homeless. Ted, however, was cursed with trust accounts left to him by his greedy father, and was never forced to come to grips with reality.
4) His isolation from reality. Ted believed in fairy tales. Ted envisioned a kingdom ruled by a jolly old soul with a puffy red face and an enormous girth. This jolly old soul was superior to ordinary human beings. He planned their lives for them, as they were too stupid to care for themselves. He granted them “rights”, like the right to food, clothing, homes, and free medical care. In Ted’s world, the jolly old soul would just wave his magic wand and all goods and services would appear - they didn’t have to be earned by the people. And even if they did, people who worked and earned things were held in contempt by Ted and his political cronies, so it wouldn’t matter if they were exploited.
Yes, Teddy was terribly handicapped. Can you imagine anyone with so many strikes against him becoming, not only a U.S. Senator, but the “lion” of the Senate? A presidential candidate? A man respected and honored by millions?
Truly extraordinary.
Topics: Commentary |


September 4th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
[...] until he sobered up, and was only charged with leaving the scene of an accident…. source: Extraordinary Ted, Investing in Vacant [...]